So many questions lingered that may never find an answer.
Your mind sets adrift with every worry, of thoughts of mere abandonment you did not suspect would come, of guilt for not having the heart to say what needs to be said. The couple of months has left a feeling of being away far too long to ever had the guts to wait again, foolishly and desperately, hoping that behind those that are shown, one day, there shall be that familiar bright red flag that tells me he was right here, sometime today.
But he never had since then.
My mind wandered aimlessly at the harsh truth that he may have grown tired after waiting for answers I did not give, for not listening to the whispers of sounds echoing from deep within the abyss of a soul who may have been wretched with sorrow or grief of which I would never had the chance to know or console… or even heal, for not seeing what was obviously being laid on the table, or heeding at the voice of the universe. The waiting has left my heart prostrate. No clues. Not even a parting word.
A ‘goodbye’ would have been much easier to swallow and accept.
Every time the sun sets right at the horizon that I had adored since young, I sank at the idea of you drifting away. The horizon becoming so clear in the distance but void, like the moments that seem to have waded to oblivion as you left me unwarned. I have wailed at the top of my lungs in silence hoping somewhere beyond the lands and waters that separate us, there where the horizons met, you could hear me. And I will see that bright red flag again and that eye beaming at me in silence at the other side of the screen, waiting.
By that time, an honest answer would be enough to suffice this waiting.